Devastation at it's best

I think this may well be the saddest blog update I have ever written!

My last post back in August informed you all I had met the most wonderful man a girl could ever hope to meet. How wrong I was............

All the promises of marriage, babies, never going to leave me didn't come to fruition. In fact he completly lived up to the navy tales of a girl in every port, living a double life blah blah blah.

Let me say first of all this man was the ultimate love of my life, I fell hook, line and sinker. He was kind, considerate, caring, passionate, no man has ever made me feel how he made me feel and probably never will again. He was, and still in my eyes is, amazing, even after everything he has said and done I know that he is all I want.

Let me take you back to the beginning............. the first 5 months of this relationship were all a girl could ask for, a man that whisked you off your feet, made you feel like so special, so loved, all was perfect. Promises of marriage etc and then he went on tour.........

Newcastle was the last leg of the tour, the last week of October 2011. It was always a worry, people like to wind you up when you have a bloke in the forces, but even so I trusted him implicitly. Apparently 34% of men cheat on their partners if they visit Newcastle, but not my man, surely not?! How wrong was I!!

A girl who not mistakenly could be taken for Miss Piggy without the sweet innocent voice came into his life and made our relationship take a completely different route. You may think "what a mug" with the next part of this post, but I have known since the week he came home, back in November that he hadn't been faithful, yet I chose to ignore it. I chose to think it was just one kiss and nothing else, I knew it wasn't but hey if you choose to be with someone in the forces you kinda have to expect something like this (apparently).

What I didn't know is that she isn't the only one! This all came out last night when he decided he couldn't trust himself anymore. Not forgetting that only last week he met this dirty geordie temptress and kissed her again! But of course, she has nothing to do with this feeling! Not even when I waved him off on his 'lads night out' last week knowing exactly what he was about to do and who he was about to meet did I face facts that the love of my life was actually a heartbreaking liar who really couldn't give a shit that he was smashing my heart to pieces. But then I find out that he has kissed yet another girl but this time in my home town! Why do men not understand that when you lie to someone who you have spent some much time with they can tell!!!!!!!!!!!!! He even tried to lie about all of it again last night! Sorry hun but you can't lie for shit!

Can I just give those of you who can't keep it in your pants some advice, if you going to cheat follow these tips:

1) Do not advise your girlfriend you have been tempted and got their phone number

2) Do not add the girl in question to your social networking profile (even when the low moraled, dirty alley cat has a boyfriend)

3) Do not give out your phone number

4) Make it a one night thing, who the hell thinks they can meet and carry on an affair with someone! YOUR ALWAYS GOING TO GET CAUGHT!


There are a lot more clues, hints, tips I could give you but I think those of you who get up to this sort of behaviour probably can't read past the number 4 so I kept it brief.

Women are clever, much more than men give us credit for. How dare a man think he can insult our intelligence by thinking I wouldn't notice. No woman who loves their man would not notice a difference.

Now you would think that when a girl finds out that the love of her life is a cheating rat that she would be in floods of tears all the time wouldn't you? Nope, the only time i've cried is when I confronted him about the first time, which was about 6-7 weeks after I found out. Then today, wow the flood gates have well and truly opened to the point where I don't think there is a drop of fluid left in my body to cry out!

I always imagined that when this eventually came out that I knew, that this blog post would be a masterpiece, something that would really name and shame him. But now when it's actually happened I just can't say anything other than how disappointed and devastated I am. Revenge is sweet but I just don't think it would make me feel better at the moment.

Whilst this blog was started because I was getting over my long term ex, with him I think the devastation was more I would miss the habit, my normal would never be normal again. Yet with this one, I am devastated because I'll miss the person, I have never got on with or loved anyone the way I loved him. Even after knowing that he has cheated on me not once, not twice but three times, if he knocked on the door now I would welcome him with open arms.

Your reading this thinking, "where on earth has Sue gone", "Sue why haven't you punched him in the face like you would normally", "Sue, what would you say to your friends if this was one of them" - the answer is quite simple really,

I love him........... more than anyone could ever imagine..............